Friday, May 4, 2018

Battle of the Serengeti

As you all maybe aware, I'm back playing EVE and having fun with a great crew in Wspace.

Some of my most memorable fights are desperate small gang fights that involve both sides reshipping, warping out, dying, putting mass on holes, using wormhole mechanics to your advantage and just going totally nuts like ship loss isn't a thing!

Though my least read posts are always my battle reports, they are by far my favorite to write... so if you don't like stupid PVP don't bother reading any further.

Battle of the Serengeti

I call it this because of the mild shit talking I did while I was trying to get a fight with a newly rolled static connection.

Its early EST and I'm the only one on other than some guy that was just logged in long enough to do PI.

I jump my cloaky legion into the newly rolled hole and see a Rorq on scan. Now I can't hope to solo one of those, even if I did ping, my EUTZ / AM EST TZ is minor at best. So, I do what any person looking for a hopeless fight would do, ship my alt into an Incursus and fly around their wormhole trying to start shit.

While I'm flying around their hole, I see a Loki and Cheetah jump from their static connection. They drop probes and quickly find our K162 to their home. In random hopes of possibly killing a Loki with my incursus and scout legion, I proceed to bait on our K162 with the incusus. Maybe they didn't see the Legion, but I'll take a T3 scout vs T3 scout fight with incursus assist any day of the week.

They don't bite, they just jump the Cheetah into our home, so I figure I'll chase with the Incursus.

This is the local chat after I miss the decloak.

NOTE: I was kind of punchy, hadn't had my coffee yet and was feeling weird.

[ 2018.05.04 14:37:35 ] Sir Lomax > the deadly incursus stalks its prey...
[ 2018.05.04 14:38:49 ] Sir Lomax > its prey, completely confused by the incursus's use of speed and cunning, hides.. doesn't drop probes, yet watchs.. and waits.. for the axe to fall...
[ 2018.05.04 14:39:57 ] Sir Lomax > is it a solo hunter? or does it have a pack of deadly fellow incursus to assist in the kill, only an excessive amount of time will tell
[ 2018.05.04 14:40:43 ] Sir Lomax > will its loki pack mate assist? or leave it to die on the sarengetteee?
[ 2018.05.04 14:43:15 ] Sir Lomax > Confused by its preys lack of movement or action the deadly incursus retires to its den
[ 2018.05.04 14:48:10 ] Hisoka Abre-Kai > So.  Ya gonna tell stories all day, or actually come shoot at something with that frig?
[ 2018.05.04 14:48:53 ] Sir Lomax > :) i like stories haha

I saw a dare devil jump into our home while watching with my cloaked Legion. I figure what the heck, and warped there with my Enyo.. I honestly wasn't awake enough to know that wasn't my Incusus anymore, I brought the Daredevil into structure and it jumped out.

Realizing that my incursus shouldn't be doing as much damage as that, I looked again, and realized, wait I'm in an Enyo! O ffs... then I reshiped back to the incursus and warped back to the hole.

I'm not kidding, I honestly felt I was in the incursus the hole time. I think this is what schizophrenia feels like.

O well, reset.

I see on Dscan a malediction warping in, then a confessor... Sure I can take that! Its an Incursus after all!!

I announce in local that I see the confessor.

[ 2018.05.04 14:55:06 ] Sir Lomax > oohh.. a confessor, that looks spicy :)
[ 2018.05.04 14:55:13 ] Sir Lomax > 1v1?
[ 2018.05.04 14:55:19 ] Sir Lomax > incursus vs confessor?
[ 2018.05.04 14:55:57 ] Sir Lomax > but who will jump into who.. does the confessor falter?

The confessor just sat there for a bit, not wanting to be the first to jump in, but I guess he was waiting on the malediction to tackle me first, because the malediction jumped in first. I just ignored it. I got reps and he's got shit dps.

Malediction points me.. Confessor jumps...Uncloaks and I just turn on the old afterburner, scram web and orbit like a boss.

I'm tanking both just fine, but its grinding on and on.. the Confessor knows hes screwed when he clearly sees hes applying little to no DPS. We are both on the hole, so it was going to be dual side fight anyway.

I got cocky:

[ 2018.05.04 14:58:25 ] Sir Lomax > whats tracking... how does it work?

But wait.. a second confessor warps to the other side of the hole. I guess he didn't want to lose a fight 2v1 in a confessor vs a T1 frig.

He gets low and jumps back into his home. Figuring that any kind honor fight was ignored at this point, I uncloaked the legion. I hold cloak on the incursus till the confessor uncloaks (he did jump first afterall) he uncloaks.. I point him in the Incursus, and get blapped into nothingness by the new confessor.

Lost the Incursus :(

[ 2018.05.04 15:00:32 ] EVE System > Channel changed to Local : J130039
[ 2018.05.04 15:02:06 ] Hisoka Abre-Kai > Oops

But I got the confessor!

So.. who oopsed who.. SIR!

 Now the Loki shows up.. at this time one of my corp mates joins voice coms. I'm holding my own just fine while I reship my Incusus pilot.

What happens next is the most chaotic 45 minute fight over a C5 connection I've ever been apart of.

Ships warping out.. ships blowing up.. me reshipping, them reshipping...  drones everywhere.. pandemonium in the streets, cats and dogs living together... END OF THE WORLD Type shit.

Naww.. but the battle report is slightly hilarious.

Yes I flew all those ships at once, I'm THAT good.... (reshipping occurred)

I'm flying a solo rep bhaal, supported by god only knows what.. jumping back and forth from hole fighting vs 2 Armageddons, multiple dictors, loki and they had a wolf rayite star effect Cerb/Caracal death camp firing squad on the other side of the hole...OMG they did so much damage in that hole, but we kept chasing each other back and forth into structure.

It was bananas.. !!!

Some of the kills...losses.

Kill Machariel

Kill Loki

Kill Proteus

Kill  Flycatcher

Loss HEE-La

Now.. the reason I lost that HEE-La is because I jumped into there not realizing it was a Wolf Ryate Star effect.. which vs.. that firing squad of small weapons and my lack of real shield... I died in a fire while only 10 seconds on my Polarizing timer remained.

To be totally honest, every loss the other guys sustained was entirely because they fucked up on their polarization timers. They chased when they shouldn't have, they over committed when they didn't need to..Good on them for bringing the fight for so long, mad tip of the hat to them.

Wormhole mechanics are the great equalizer in Wspace.

All in all, it was a great set of engagements that used up every single drop of mass on that wormhole connection. Nonstop fighting that ended with us having a trapped Mach stuck on our side.

No quarter was given..  None was asked:)


  1. Still loving your blog man! More than just me and moms read it (referencing your joke that only your mom reads)

  2. For the love of god, please put the "R" in Incursus. And on Reddit.

    1. Fixed! LOL my bad. The reddit post.. i can't fix. Now i feel dumb and sad. :(

  3. I loved listening to those stories when they were a podcast, and am really glad to see you're at it again. Great job!

    P.S. Pretty sure I'm not your mom.

  4. Great to see you having so much fun again. Chaotic fights like that always seemed to be your favorite